A Tale of Two Sisters and Listening
By Leslie Sann
We don’t see things as they are; we see them as we are.
—Anaïs Nin
During a recent visit to the East Coast, I spent time with two sisters in my family. My 98-year-old aunt in Maryland embraces the natural decline of her physical abilities with grace and gratitude. She uses a walker and hearing aids and says, What do you expect at 98? I’m doing great.
In contrast, my mother in New York frames her hearing loss as a burden, saying, Getting old sucks. This difference in perspective creates two entirely different realities. My aunt’s acceptance brings her peace, while my mother’s resistance brings frustration.
This contrast highlights a fundamental truth: our point of view creates our reality. We often think we’re listening to what’s happening, but in reality, we’re listening through the filter of our own stories and interpretations. This fundamental flaw in our humanity undermines our relationships because we’re not truly listening to others—we’re listening to the stories we live in.
So, how do we become better listeners?
We learn to listen to our listening.
We check our assumptions: This is what I thought you said—did I hear you correctly?
By slowing down our conversations and attuning to the other person, not our rhetoric, we foster genuine connection.
If you’d like to transform how you listen and, in turn, transform your relationships and your reality, I invite you to join my upcoming class on The Art of Listening. Together, we’ll learn how to tune into what’s truly being communicated, beyond the stories we tell ourselves.
Blessings and Joy,
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